Thursday, March 3, 2016

Those Famous Paintings... And their derivatives!

Most of the famous paintings are highly recognizable. Consequently, people make modification on them. On the one hand, some of the most distinguished features are preserved. On the other hand, it is more fun or more fashion elements inside the modified version.
Start with Sadro Botticelli of his famous "The birth of Venus"
Birth of Venus by Sadro Botticelli
Then in a rococo fashion ( though not stronly related )
rococo, birth of Venus
And then, we have modern versions, start with a less modern one that by re-organizing Japanese prints
modern modification
And I believe this is from some amination
modern modification
And kitties!
modern modification
And Disney...
modern modification
Also, the one by someone who was still a kid when Sadro Botticelli was quite famous:
Start with his original work
**
Then one the most famous one, a mock by (fill in whatever you like, I have seen it in my university's physics department when I was on my way to meet my committee members). Chen is the one who shown me this at the first place
Flying Spaghetti
And others, such as Disney
modern modification
And another related to Disney Industry
modern modification
And one apparently inspired by E.T.
modern modification
I guess this is on some art show, maybe 3D painting
modern modification
and LINUX!
modern modification
LAST: My appreciation for those great artists who visualized these scenes at the first place. Without your hard work, this world would be a very boring place.

Tuesday, March 1, 2016

老外损人的英语绝句

我们中国有“杀人不见血”之说,老外损起人来,也是“惊天地,泣鬼神”,一起看看吧!
1.Got into the gene pool while lifeguard wasn't watching.
1.他肯定是趁救生员不备,跳进基因池。

2.A room temperature IQ.
2.IQ值简直和室温一样高。


3.During evolution,his ancestors were in the control group.
3.进化时,他的祖先肯定是当权派。(要不是走后门,他怎么有机会进化成人? )


4.Has two brains;one is lost and the other is out looking for it.
4.他有两个大脑,一个丢了,另一个去找去了。


5.He's so dense,the light bends around his.
5.他太蠢了,光碰到他多要拐向走。


6.If he were any more stupid,he'd have to be watered twice a week.
6.如果他再笨点儿,就要一周给他浇两次水了。(把他当植物来看了。)


7.Some drink from the fountain of knowledge,but he just gargled.
7.人家畅饮智慧之泉,他只是拿来漱了漱口。


8.It takes him an-hour-and-a-half to watch "60 Minutes".
8.他要花一个半小时来观察一个小时。


9.He sets low personal standards and then consistently fail to achieve them.
9.他给自己设定的标准很低,但每次还是达不到。


10.If you gave him a penny for his thoughts,you'd get change.
10.如果你用一分钱买他的想法,你还能拿到找零的。

~!#$%^&*这些符号怎么读? 当然是用英语(键盘特殊符号小结)

 我们每天都看见或敲击这些符号,但不见得当老外或老师用英语说出这些符号时我们能立即反应过来,这正是促成此文的原因。纵观网上前辈们总结的此类文章,难免有点不太透彻,于是在前人基础上加入了自己的几个小时,因此本文并非开创性的,欢迎转载或收藏!更欢迎对此文的改进!
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1. ~ 波浪号tilde,源于西班牙语和葡语中的发音符号。
2. ! 感叹号exclamation mark/exclamation point/bang,无需多解释,在这个 “咆哮体”盛行的时代,想不懂这个都难。
3. # 汉语中因形似“井”,通常读作井号,真正的含义是数字符号(Number sign),如在一些国家‘#1’代表No.1的意思。在美式英语中一般称作pound sign,电话上的“#”叫做pound key,而加拿大英语则称之为number sign key;北美以外的其他英语国家一般称“#”为hash,相应的电话键叫做hash key。注意数字符号(#)极易和乐谱中的升音符(♯ 读作sharp)相混淆。但是,乐谱的sharp和数字符号的字形不完全一样。标准数字符号(#)横线水平,而竖线向右倾斜;而乐谱的升号(♯)为了在五线谱中容易识别,横线改为斜向上但竖线垂直。我猜此时有人就会举出一个极好的反例来否定上述说法,那就是C#(C Sharp)。的确,乍一看确实不相符!但事实上,C#并不违背上述结论,C Sharp中符号Sharp的创意正是来源于升音符♯在乐谱中的含义——紧跟其后的音符的音高比实际标定的高半音,表示技术进一步提升之意(要不直接把C#本土化,翻译成“C优”算了^_^,这个命名方法有点类似于C++中“++”表示变量增1)。由于“♯”在计算机显示、输入中不方便,因此在书写体中用“#”代替“♯”,但读音保持不变。于是就出现了书写成“C#”但念作“C Sharp”的情形,了解渊源之后发现其实并不矛盾。
4. $  dollar/peso sign,我们通常把这个当作美元(USD)的符号,但拉丁美洲一些国家的人们会认为“$” 代表比索(peso),所以,不引起误解,最好用“US$”代表美元。这个符号的起源还存在争议,其中有一种说法是这样的:在18世纪末,货币单位比索的手写缩写符号是“ps”,随着时间推移,p和s感情渐进、关系日益密切,最后重叠在一起形成了现在的“$”。
5. % 百分号,percent sign。
6. ^  a读caret,表示间距符 “^ ”或 “‸”,也称作wedge, up-arrow, hat,数学中通常叫做hat;b读circumflex (^),是发音符号,常见用法如Â。
7. &  ampersand/and,单词“and”的简写形式。
8. *  asterisk/star,计算机和数学中称作“star”更常见。
9. ()  round brackets/open brackets;  [ ]  square brackets/closed brackets;  { }  curly brackets/definite brackets;   < >  angle brackets/triangular brackets,除了用作尖括号,也用作不等号,小于号<(less-than),大于号>(greater-than)。
10. /  斜杠,slash,为与“\”相区别,通常也叫forward slash。
11. \  反斜杠,backslash。
12. +  加号,plus sign; - 减号,minus sign。
13. - – —  dash,英文中dash有三种类型,分别是figure dash, en dash, em dash(依次如前所示)。figure dash即数字线,因其宽度等同于一个数字的宽度而得名,用于数字之间的连接,但并不含有某个连续范围的意思,如010-321654;en dash或n dash代表宽度等于字母“n”的横线,用于包含连续的范围、区间值之间,如June–July 1967, 1:00–2:00 p.m. ; em dash或m dash,宽度等于字母“m”,自然,长度为en dash的2倍,用于表示思绪、说话的断续,或语气的转折,这才是真正的对应于中文里的破折号!在Word下输入en dash 和em dash的方法分别是ALT+0150,ALT+0151。
14. - 连字符hyphen,用于连接两个单词或一个单词分开的字母之间。
注:理论上,figure dash,hyphen和minus sign在长度和位置上是有区别的,不过很难辨别,我刚开始也试图从长度上寻求突破而无果,后来觉得仅仅从长度去区别意义不大,而且没有抓住问题的本质。换个思路,只要深刻理解各符号在用法和含义上的不同,碰到此类情况就迎刃而解了。
15. _ 下划线,underscore/understrike/low line。

补充16.  和~同键的`在语言中通常叫grave accent, 是一些语种里面的重音符,如À。在编程语言中通常叫back quote 或 backtick。
补充17.   和反斜杠同键的|叫做vertical bar,同时也在不同的情景中叫polo,pipe等(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vertical_bar)。
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    后记:平日里觉得键盘只是一个微不足道的工具,价值不过几十,经过几个小时的资料查询、翻译和整理,却有了额外的一些感想:一点水可以反映出太阳的光辉,小小的键盘更是绚烂多彩的人类文明的结晶,是的,毫无疑问人类的语言和智慧在键盘的字母和符号中得到了足够的体现!最后,感谢google,感谢wikipedia!  
    Ps:本来是随便写写的一篇笔记,没想到有这么多人参与进来讨论,挑出了不少毛病,补充了大量原文中没有提到的。这一方面让我为这篇挂一漏万的小结森森地感到汗颜,另一方面我也学习了不少,在此统一向你们致谢——谢谢!
    确实,不同的符号在不同的情景、不同的地域、不同的人群中有着不同的读法,只要是不影响交流,这些存在的都是合理的。

老外最精彩的一句话网络笑话,基本上都无法翻译

1、I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness. 
2、I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. 
3、Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience. 
4、The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list. 
5、If sex is a pain in the ass, then you're doing it wrong... 
6、The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. 
7、We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police. 
8、Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand. 
9、Some people are like Slinkies ... not really good for anything, but you can't help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs. 
10、Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason. 
11、War does not determine who is right - only who is left. 
12、Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship. 
13、We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public. 
14、Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich. 
15、Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
16、My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch. 
17、I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks. 
18、If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments. 
19、Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer. 
20、Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't. 
21、How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire? 
22、If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it? 
23、Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad. 
24、If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining. 
25、Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. 
26、I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian 
27、A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station.. 
28、If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong. 
29、Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish? 
30、A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. 
31、I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it...so I said "Implants?" 
32、Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up. 
33、Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet? 
34、Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt. 
35、A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don't need it. 
36、Laugh at your problems, everybody else does. 
37、The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas! 
38、A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. 
39、Good girls are bad girls that never get caught. 
40、He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame. 
41、Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy. 
42、The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room. 
43、The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. 
44、To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research. 
45、Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go. 
46、I discovered I scream the same way whether I'm about to be devoured by a great white shark or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot. 
47、Crowded elevators smell different to midgets. 
48、I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you. 
49、Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "If an emergency, notify:" I put "DOCTOR". What's my mother going to do? 
50、God must love stupid people. He made SO many. 
51、Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman. 
52、I always take life with a grain of salt, ...plus a slice of lemon, ...and a shot of tequila. 
53、The sole purpose of a child's middle name, is so he can tell when he's really in trouble. 
54、It's not the fall that kills you; it's the sudden stop at the end. 
55、Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity. 
56、Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat. 
57、There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away. 
58、A bargain is something you don't need at a price you can't resist. 
59、Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose. 
60、My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right. 
61、My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too. 
62、A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying." 
63、Some people say "If you can't beat them, join them". I say "If you can't beat them, beat them", because they will be expecting you to join them, so you will have the element of surprise. 
64、When in doubt, mumble. 
65、I intend to live forever. So far, so good. 
66、Hospitality: making your guests feel like they're at home, even if you wish they were. 
67、If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you! 
68、A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer. 
69、Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. So study hard and be evil. 
70、Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with. 
71、Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back. 
72、Worrying works! 90% of the things I worry about never happen. 
73、Virginity is like a soapbubble, one prick and it is gone. 
74、Nostalgia isn't what it used to be. 
75、With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine. 
76、I should've known it wasn't going to work out between my ex-wife and me. After all, I'm a Libra and she's a bitch. 
77、Hallmark Card: "I'm so miserable without you, it's almost like you're still here." 
78、You're never too old to learn something stupid. 
79、A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip. 
80、I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face." I said, "You'll be sorry." He said, "Oh, yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well." 
81、Some people hear voices.. Some see invisible people.. Others have no imagination whatsoever. 
82、I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours. 
83、We have enough gun control. What we need is idiot control. 
84、Women may not hit harder, but they hit lower. 
85、Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off. 
86、Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you're an asshole. 
87、I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure. 
88、I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die. 
89、If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you'll have trouble putting on your pants. 
90、To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target. 
91、You are such a good friend that if we were on a sinking ship together and there was only one life jacket... I'd miss you heaps and think of you often. 
92、Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. 
93、Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. 
94、If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child. 
95、A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it. 
96、Whoever coined the phrase "Quiet as a mouse" has never stepped on one. 
97、You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice. 
98、The difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer is in the taste. 
99、When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water. 
100、Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast.

怎么写篇漂亮的research proposal,流传很广的写作指南。言简意赅,很实用~~

文章作者Paul T. P. Wong, Ph.D., C.Psych. (Research Director, Graduate Program in Counselling Psychology. Trinity Western University Langley, BC, Canada).
题为:How to Write a Research Proposal. 全文转载如下:
  
  Most students and beginning researchers do not fully understand what a research proposal means, nor do they understand its importance. To put it bluntly, one’s research is only as a good as one’s proposal. An ill-conceived proposal dooms the project even if it somehow gets through the Thesis Supervisory Committee. A high quality proposal, on the other hand, not only promises success for the project, but also impresses your Thesis Committee about your potential as a researcher.
  
  A research proposal is intended to convince others that you have a worthwhile research project and that you have the competence and the work-plan to complete it. Generally, a research proposal should contain all the key elements involved in the research process and include sufficient information for the readers to evaluate the proposed study.
  
  Regardless of your research area and the methodology you choose, all research proposals must address the following questions: What you plan to accomplish, why you want to do it and how you are going to do it.
  
  The proposal should have sufficient information to convince your readers that you have an important research idea, that you have a good grasp of the relevant literature and the major issues, and that your methodology is sound.
  
  The quality of your research proposal depends not only on the quality of your proposed project, but also on the quality of your proposal writing. A good research project may run the risk of rejection simply because the proposal is poorly written. Therefore, it pays if your writing is coherent, clear and compelling.
  
  This paper focuses on proposal writing rather than on the development of research ideas.
  
  Title:
  
  It should be concise and descriptive. For example, the phrase, “An investigation of . . .” could be omitted. Often titles are stated in terms of a functional relationship, because such titles clearly indicate the independent and dependent variables. However, if possible, think of an informative but catchy title. An effective title not only pricks the reader’s interest, but also predisposes him/her favourably towards the proposal.
  
  Abstract:
  
  It is a brief summary of approximately 300 words. It should include the research question, the rationale for the study, the hypothesis (if any), the method and the main findings. Descriptions of the method may include the design, procedures, the sample and any instruments that will be used.
  
  Introduction:
  
  The main purpose of the introduction is to provide the necessary background or context for your research problem. How to frame the research problem is perhaps the biggest problem in proposal writing.
  
  If the research problem is framed in the context of a general, rambling literature review, then the research question may appear trivial and uninteresting. However, if the same question is placed in the context of a very focused and current research area, its significance will become evident.
  
   Unfortunately, there are no hard and fast rules on how to frame your research question just as there is no prescription on how to write an interesting and informative opening paragraph. A lot depends on your creativity, your ability to think clearly and the depth of your understanding of problem areas.
 
  However, try to place your research question in the context of either a current “hot” area, or an older area that remains viable. Secondly, you need to provide a brief but appropriate historical backdrop. Thirdly, provide the contemporary context in which your proposed research question occupies the central stage. Finally, identify “key players” and refer to the most relevant and representative publications. In short, try to paint your research question in broad brushes and at the same time bring out its significance.
  
  The introduction typically begins with a general statement of the problem area, with a focus on a specific research problem, to be followed by the rational or justification for the proposed study. The introduction generally covers the following elements:
 
    1. State the research problem, which is often referred to as the purpose of the study.
  2. Provide the context and set the stage for your research question in such a way as to show its necessity and importance.
  3. Present the rationale of your proposed study and clearly indicate why it is worth doing.
  4. Briefly describe the major issues and sub-problems to be addressed by your research.
  5. Identify the key independent and dependent variables of your experiment. Alternatively, specify the phenomenon you want to study.
  6. State your hypothesis or theory, if any. For exploratory or phenomenological research, you may not have any hypotheses. (Please do not confuse the hypothesis with the statistical null hypothesis.)
  7. Set the delimitation or boundaries of your proposed research in order to provide a clear focus.
  8. Provide definitions of key concepts. (This is optional.)
     
  Literature Review:
  
  Sometimes the literature review is incorporated into the introduction section. However, most professors prefer a separate section, which allows a more thorough review of the literature.
  
  The literature review serves several important functions:
  
  1. Ensures that you are not “reinventing the wheel”.
  2. Gives credits to those who have laid the groundwork for your research.
  3. Demonstrates your knowledge of the research problem.
  4. Demonstrates your understanding of the theoretical and research issues related to your research question.
  5. Shows your ability to critically evaluate relevant literature information.
  6. Indicates your ability to integrate and synthesize the existing literature.
  7. Provides new theoretical insights or develops a new model as the conceptual framework for your research.
  8. Convinces your reader that your proposed research will make a significant and substantial contribution to the literature (i.e., resolving an important theoretical issue or filling a major gap in the literature).
  
  Most students’ literature reviews suffer from the following problems:
  
  * Lacking organization and structure
  * Lacking focus, unity and coherence
  * Being repetitive and verbose
  * Failing to cite influential papers
  * Failing to keep up with recent developments
  * Failing to critically evaluate cited papers
  * Citing irrelevant or trivial references
  * Depending too much on secondary sources
  
  Your scholarship and research competence will be questioned if any of the above applies to your proposal.
  
  There are different ways to organize your literature review. Make use of subheadings to bring order and coherence to your review. For example, having established the importance of your research area and its current state of development, you may devote several subsections on related issues as: theoretical models, measuring instruments, cross-cultural and gender differences, etc.
  
  It is also helpful to keep in mind that you are telling a story to an audience. Try to tell it in a stimulating and engaging manner. Do not bore them, because it may lead to rejection of your worthy proposal. (Remember: Professors and scientists are human beings too.)
  
  Methods:
  
  The Method section is very important because it tells your Research Committee how you plan to tackle your research problem. It will provide your work plan and describe the activities necessary for the completion of your project.
  
  The guiding principle for writing the Method section is that it should contain sufficient information for the reader to determine whether methodology is sound. Some even argue that a good proposal should contain sufficient details for another qualified researcher to implement the study.
  
  You need to demonstrate your knowledge of alternative methods and make the case that your approach is the most appropriate and most valid way to address your research question.
  
  Please note that your research question may be best answered by qualitative research. However, since most mainstream psychologists are still biased against qualitative research, especially the phenomenological variety, you may need to justify your qualitative method.
  
  Furthermore, since there are no well-established and widely accepted canons in qualitative analysis, your method section needs to be more elaborate than what is required for traditional quantitative research. More importantly, the data collection process in qualitative research has a far greater impact on the results as compared to quantitative research. That is another reason for greater care in describing how you will collect and analyze your data. (How to write the Method section for qualitative research is a topic for another paper.)
  
  For quantitative studies, the method section typically consists of the following sections:
  
  1. Design -Is it a questionnaire study or a laboratory experiment? What kind of design do you choose?
  2. Subjects or participants - Who will take part in your study ? What kind of sampling procedure do you use?
  3. Instruments - What kind of measuring instruments or questionnaires do you use? Why do you choose them? Are they valid and reliable?
  4. Procedure - How do you plan to carry out your study? What activities are involved? How long does it take?
  
  Results:
  
  Obviously you do not have results at the proposal stage. However, you need to have some idea about what kind of data you will be collecting, and what statistical procedures will be used in order to answer your research question or test you hypothesis.
  
  Discussion:
  
  It is important to convince your reader of the potential impact of your proposed research. You need to communicate a sense of enthusiasm and confidence without exaggerating the merits of your proposal. That is why you also need to mention the limitations and weaknesses of the proposed research, which may be justified by time and financial constraints as well as by the early developmental stage of your research area.
  
  Common Mistakes in Proposal Writing
  
  1. Failure to provide the proper context to frame the research question.
  2. Failure to delimit the boundary conditions for your research.
  3. Failure to cite landmark studies.
  4. Failure to accurately present the theoretical and empirical contributions by other researchers.
  5. Failure to stay focused on the research question.
  6. Failure to develop a coherent and persuasive argument for the proposed research.
  7. Too much detail on minor issues, but not enough detail on major issues.
  8. Too much rambling — going “all over the map” without a clear sense of direction. (The best proposals move forward with ease and grace like a seamless river.)
  9. Too many citation lapses and incorrect references.
  10. Too long or too short.
  11. Failing to follow the APA style.
  12. Slopping writing.
  
  下面是来自其他一些学术从业者关于如何写proposal的意见:
  
   * Writing Research Proposals, Drew University On-line resources for writers.
   * Guide to Writing a Research Proposal, University of Technology, Sydney. (A research proposal is required for admission to the program.)
   * Beginners Guide to the Research Proposal, University of Calgary Centre for Advancement of Health.
   * The Art of Writing Proposals: Some Candid Suggestions for Applicants to Social Science Research Council Competitions, Adam Przeworski and Frank Salomon.
   * The Elements of a Proposal, Frank Pajares, Emory University.
  
  以及,关于如何写学位论文proposal的指导(Dissertation Proposal Writing and some strategies for completing the dissertation)
  
   * Dissertation Proposal Workshop, Institute of International Studies, UC-Berkeley.
   * Writing and Presenting your Thesis or Dissertation , LearningAssociates.net.
   * Dissertation/Project Hints: Proposal Writing, Hazel Hall, School of Computing, Napier University, Edinburgh, UK.
   * Writing Theses and Dissertations, Claremont Graduate University Writing Center.

帝国灭亡的方式:败亡与溃灭

       一套十五本的大书《罗马人的故事》摆在我面前,此书的宣传语是“古罗马,今天的中国最需要懂的国家”,这是此书作者日本女作家盐野七生在“给中国读者的序”中表达的主要意思。她说:“对于以超级大国为发展目标的当代中国,在欧洲历史上可作为借鉴的,唯有古罗马帝国了。”这是什么意思?
   
     我的兴趣被勾起来了。用了半年多的时间,我读了这十五本书,接着又读了她的另外一本书《罗马灭亡后的地中海世界》和英国学者斯蒂文•朗西曼的著作《1453——君士坦丁堡的陷落》等几本有关的书。同时还拿日本讲谈社出版的一套中国通史《中国的历史》(共十本,由一批日本著名学者分别创作)作为参照。
   
    人到晚年,重读历史,思考现实,回忆人生,一种宏大的历史感不由得在心头升起。手有些痒,想动笔写点东西,不为出版见报,只为记录自己的感受和思想。第一篇当然是感受最深的问题:帝国兴亡。这确实是当代中国人最关心的话题之一。我没有像电视片《大国崛起》那样从帝国之兴谈起,而是反过来从帝国之亡下笔,原因很简单:这个问题似乎更迫切。
   
     (一)
   
    公元前146年,古罗马军队攻克了北非的迦太基城(位于现在的突尼斯湾),曾经隔海傲视欧洲大陆的西地中海霸主迦太基帝国宣告灭亡。在一百二十多年中打了三场布匿战争的古罗马终于战胜并消灭了这个早期最强大的宿敌。
   
    这场史称“第三次布匿战争”的结果极为惨烈,三面临海一面凭山的迦太基城在被围三年后终于破城。罗马军队避开凭山而建的坚固城墙,从城东南的海上登陆,突入城内。迦太基守军点燃了排列在外港的仓库和造船厂,在熊熊火海中逐房逐街地展开了巷战。激烈的巷战持续了六天六夜。到第七天,城中心神殿林立的比尔萨也燃起了大火,残余的迦太基战士和宁死不愿做奴隶的市民纷纷纵身跳入火海,与自己的帝国一起灰飞烟灭了、、、、、、
   
    战斗结束后,有七百年历史,曾经极尽繁华的迦太基城化作了冒着黑烟的瓦砾之山。这个在世界战争史上曾留下过“汗尼拔远征”传奇,一度将远征军开到罗马城下的古老帝国,被上帝之指在历史的键盘上轻轻一点,便从地球上被删除了,几乎没有留下任何痕迹。迦太基从此亡国,成了罗马的非洲行省。被俘的几万市民成了铁链锁颈的奴隶,城市的废墟被犁平,地面还被撒上了一层盐,这片原本富饶的土地成了寸草不生的不毛之地,与南面的撒哈拉大沙漠连成了一片。如今人们只能从沙漠边沿一些残存的巨石上找到它的些许遗迹。迦太基的覆灭成了人类历史上大帝国灭亡最惨烈,也最让人回肠荡气的一个悲剧。
    迦太基的灭亡,悲惨但不乏壮烈的美感,这个强悍的民族,这个尚武的帝国,一直战斗到生命的最后一息才轰然倒下。它值得所有的人,包括他的敌人所敬重。检点一下在此之前灭亡的帝国,如亚述、波斯、马其顿以及后来各时代一些匆匆来去的帝国,能得到这种荣誉结局的帝国并不多、、、、、、
   
    当时指挥罗马军队的统帅是西庇阿•埃米利乌斯,他是曾经在第二次布匿战争中打败过汉尼拔的名将西庇阿•阿非利加努斯的养孙,史称“小西庇阿”。这位得胜的年轻统帅(当时39岁)站在迦太基烟尘还未散尽的废墟上,没有露出一丝笑容,反而泪流满面,他说出了一段永载史册的话:
   
    “、、、、、、迦太基曾经享尽荣华,然而现在,我们却站在这一帝国灭亡的伟大瞬间。我在想,我们罗马或许也会迎来这样的时刻吧。”
   
    这位创造了历史的英雄在自己所创造的历史面前谦卑地低下了头。他从强敌的覆灭中领悟到一个真理:世界上没有不落的太阳,没有永远的帝国,没有不散的宴席,更没有永存的盛世。凡是萌芽于泥土的生命都有复归于泥土的那一天,万物如此,人生如此,帝国也是如此,这才是真正的“宇宙真理”。像小西庇阿这样能在胜利时预见到了失败和灭亡终将降临的人,才是真正高明的哲人智者。而一般俗物是没有如此的智慧和见识的,古今中外有多少胜利者和成功者在这一刻的梦想都是永盛不衰、千秋万代和万寿无疆、、、、、、
   
    然而,小西庇阿的预言并没有完全实现,他的祖国古罗马最后的结局比这还要悲惨和黯淡。
   
     (二)
   
    在迦太基灭亡622年以后,古罗马帝国(这里指的是西罗马帝国)终于也在公元476年灭亡了。但是,西罗马帝国的灭亡平平淡淡,悄无声息,并没有如迦太基陷落那样悲壮惨烈的“伟大瞬间”,没有明确的时间,没有标志性的事件,甚至没有一场像样的攻守之战,它没有资格获得迦太基式的哀荣。
   
    古罗马帝国的灭亡是一个漫长的过程。经过了几百年的王政、共和,在公元前一世纪,从凯撒、屋大维(奥古斯都)统治时期开始进入帝制(包括“元首制”和“绝对君主制”)时代,也进入了罗马帝国最辉煌的巅峰时期。但所谓巅峰,换一个角度来看也就是下坡路的开始。
   
    一个以地中海为“内湖”,纵横跨越欧、亚、非大陆的千年大帝国,其“青春期”相对来说并不长,大约不到一百年——从公元前44年凯撒被暗杀,屋大维被指定为他的养子和继承人,并在公元前27年屋大维正式称“奥古斯都”,到他去世的公元14年,这半个多世纪就是帝国的黄金时代,奥古斯都死后,这个辉煌期只在他指定的继承人提比略手下延伸了二十多年,随后就陷入了长期的政治危机之中——为了争夺最高权力,宫廷阴谋层出不穷,皇帝被暗杀、被自杀、被诛杀的政变频频发生。古罗马帝制的开创者凯撒的被暗杀,似乎是个宿命式的预言,为帝国的命运蒙上了一层暗红的血色——从此,反叛、政变和弑君几乎成了罗马帝国政治史的“主旋律”。
   
    笔者做了一个粗略的统计,从凯撒创立帝制开始,到公元476年西罗马帝国灭亡的五百年多间,登上帝国皇帝宝座,或者曾经称帝者共有七十多人(其中在位时间最长的是奥古斯都,而在位时间最短者名字可以排成一大串,有些只有几天到几个月),其中在位正常死亡者有十五人,被暗杀、诛杀者三十四人,被迫自杀者七人,死于战场或征战途中者十人。也就是说,寿终正寝者只占五分之一,而非正常死亡者高达八成。看来,在罗马帝国,当皇帝确是个风险极高的行当,是个需要拿生命当筹码的大赌局——其实何止罗马帝国,凡是专制极权的独裁者,能得善终者寥寥,而死于非命者比肩接踵,史不绝书,这种现象一直延续到现代(请想想齐奥塞斯库、萨达姆、卡扎菲们的下场)。虽然酋长制、王制、共和制、帝制等人类社会出现过的几乎所有政治体制,在古罗马都曾有过雏形或做过实验,但是,罗马帝国从来就没有创造出权力的和平转移和安全退出机制(现代专制独裁政体至今也没能解决这一难题),前现代文明的最高权力争斗似乎只有消灭竞争对手肉体这唯一的出路,而终生剥夺败落者的自由则成了最人道、最仁慈的例外恩典。如此看来,被后代专制独裁者们奉为圭臬的冷血政治理论——马基雅维利主义产生于这个时代和这个国度,是不足为怪的。
   
    围绕着最高权力的残酷内争和内斗,是古罗马帝国无法摆脱的梦魇(也是古往今来所有专制政体难逃的铁律和噩运),这是帝国最后走向灭亡的最主要内因。不管这个千年帝国曾经创造过多少辉煌的政治、经济和文化奇迹,但这条权力的血酬定律就注定了它的最终灭亡是不可避免的。帝国这只巨蟒的死亡是从吞噬自己的尾巴开始的。
    导致罗马帝国最终灭亡的外因是异族入侵。古罗马从建国以来,始终没有摆脱过“蛮族”的侵扰和威胁。如早期的腓尼基人,波斯人,高卢人和日尔曼人,后来的西哥特人,东哥特人,汪达尔人,以及匈奴人,突厥人(奥斯曼)和被称为撒拉森人的伊斯兰阿拉伯人、、、、、、不同的是,在帝国早期凭借着强大的经济、军事力量,和高屋建瓴、充满自信的同化兼容政策,帝国能够从容地应对这种挑战,并且不断地通过吸收各民族的文化和人口,构建起一个多民族共存的强大帝国;而到了帝国的中晚期,它已经逐渐失去了这样的魄力、气度和自信,也失去了掌控民族矛盾的能力,只能消极被动地应付挑战,眼睁睁地看着这个曾经的多民族大熔炉变成了各民族血腥混战的角斗场——所有多民族组成的帝国在崩溃前后都避免不了这样一场浩劫,苏联红色帝国终结前后的车臣战争和乌克兰危机就是这一帝国遗产的最新例证。
   
    在激烈而持续的权力争夺中,帝国的分裂也是不可避免的宿命。罗马帝国早就出现过短期的分裂,后来还做过“二帝共治”、“四帝共治”的体制改革实验(均以失败告终),其实那只是帝国分裂的先声。到了公元395年,狄奥多西皇帝逝世。帝国东部由其长子阿卡狄乌斯、西部由次子霍诺里乌斯继承。从此罗马帝国正式分裂为东西两个帝国。应该说,古罗马帝国到此已经该算是终结了。但是,人们一般还是把帝国的生存年限向后延长将近一百年,因为“百足之虫,死而不僵”,那不断萎缩的半个帝国还在苟延残喘着。
   
    西罗马帝国的尾声是黯淡无光的。霍诺里乌斯在位二十三年,其间唯一的亮点是,在阿拉里克率领西哥特人和拉达加伊索率领东哥特人相继入侵的时候,被称为“最后的罗马人”的斯提利科将军领导了力量悬殊、几乎无望的抗战,并且居然连连取胜——这是古罗马最后的回光返照。但是,年轻的皇帝无法容忍这位将军在凯旋仪式上的光芒盖过了自己,408年,在斯提利科觐见皇帝时,皇帝竟然以“叛逆罪”将其处死(这与中国明末将领袁崇焕的命运何其相似)。
   
    “最后的罗马人”死了,异族的入侵再也无人阻挡了。410年8月,西哥特人长驱直入,进入首都,进行了长达五天的大劫掠,史称“罗马浩劫”。
   
    423年,霍诺里乌斯皇帝死了,帝国的史册最后几页上是一连串耻辱而荒唐的内乱外患记录,再也没有任何亮点:
   
    422年,汪达尔人占领迦太基,统治了整个北非(原为西罗马帝国的行省)。而西罗马皇帝瓦伦提尼安三世对此只能无奈地表示承认。
   
    455年,被东方大汉帝国驱逐的匈奴人像洪水一样涌入欧洲,他们中的一支在阿拉提率领下越过多瑙河和阿尔卑斯山,大举进入意大利,四出劫掠。
   
    同年,皇帝瓦伦提尼安三世在阅兵式上被刺身亡,起因很荒唐:皇帝手下的“联军总司令”埃提乌斯替自己的儿子向皇帝的女儿求婚,皇帝勃然大怒,抽出匕首将埃提乌斯当场刺死。
   
    瓦伦提尼安三世死后,马克西穆斯继位,但两个多月后被杀。
   
    不久,汪达尔人再次洗劫罗马城,古城再遭“罗马浩劫”。
   
    第二年,新皇帝阿维图斯也被杀。461年,继任皇帝马约里安被杀。接着,皇帝塞维鲁在465年去世。安特米乌斯继承帝位后,472年奥利布里乌斯也宣布称帝,出现了“天现二日”的局面,两个皇帝率领各自的罗马军队在罗马城内决战,血流成河。结果是安特米乌斯战死,而奥利布里乌斯过了几天也被暗杀。
   
    此后,一个叫格利西里乌斯的人当了几天皇帝,又被权臣奥列斯特年幼的儿子罗穆路斯•奥古斯都所取代——这就是西罗马帝国的最后一个皇帝。有趣的是,这个末代皇帝与公元前753年罗马开国时的国王罗穆路斯同名。罗马始于罗穆路斯,终于罗穆路斯,这大概是天意吧。
   
    在西罗马军队中服役的蛮族将军奥多亚克不服从权臣奥列斯特树起的傀儡皇帝,举兵造反。奥列斯特战败被俘,当场被杀。而他的儿子罗穆路斯只好宣布退位。取胜的奥多亚克干脆把那顶不吉利的“罗马皇帝”金冠扔到一边,而自称为“意大利王”,罗马帝国的历史到此就真的终结了。
   
    曾经有过辉煌历史的环地中海大帝国没有一个值得人们记忆的结局,它就像一个巨大的冰块悄悄地消融了,最后化作一洼浊水;或者像秋天的树叶一样无声无息地飘落净尽,迎来了萧瑟的寒冬,谁也说不清它灭亡在哪一天哪一时哪一刻。严格地说,它不是被谁征服和毁灭了,而是由于自身腐败和无休止的权力争斗而自我解体和溃散了。
    请记住,在世界上曾经有过的帝国灭亡史中,有一类灭亡不叫败亡(如迦太基),而叫溃灭(如西罗马)。这种灭亡形式更值得一面沉迷于“大国崛起”之梦,一面又天天忧虑“亡党亡国”的中国人深思。
   
     (三)
   
    西罗马帝国灭亡后,首都设在拜占廷(后来叫君士坦丁堡,被奥斯曼土耳其人占领后叫伊斯坦布尔)的东罗马帝国还延续了近千年,但严格地说,那已经不是罗马帝国,而是一个另外一个帝国了,人们一般把它叫做拜占廷帝国。
   
    公元1453年,已经失去了几乎全部领土,只剩下一座孤城的君士坦丁堡终于被奥斯曼土耳其攻陷。值得一提的是,东罗马帝国的终结似乎比西罗马帝国要有声有色一点——历史记录下了一场惨烈的君士坦丁堡攻防战。
   
    为了攻克君士坦丁堡,奥斯曼帝国调集了超过十万的大军,和上百艘战船,装备了当时世界上最大的“乌尔班大炮”,将君士坦丁堡团团包围。而守城的东罗马兵力只有区区七千人。
   
    这场战争打了将近两个月。奥斯曼人四月初开始围城,君士坦丁堡的军民奋力守城,几次击退了奥斯曼人的总攻。直到五月二十八日才有一支奥斯曼精锐部队从科克波塔门攻进了城内。东罗马帝国的最后一位皇帝君士坦丁(也许是天意巧合,他与创建这座新都的皇帝君士坦丁同名)闻讯领着一队战士赶来增援,企图堵住缺口,在乱军激战中皇帝失去了踪影。战后奥斯曼人宣称在死尸堆里发现了他的尸体,并割下了他的头颅向土耳其苏丹去献礼请功——就像沉船的船长伴着大船一起沉没一样,末代的君士坦丁皇帝为君士坦丁帝国的灭亡做了死殉,从而完美了一个悲剧的结局。
   
    破城后,多数守城将士都战死(有个统计说战死将士有四千多人),接着全城遭到土耳其士兵的三天洗劫——值得庆幸的是,奥斯曼人并没有把这个城市夷为平地,而只是把大部分辉煌华丽的东正教教堂改造成了伊斯兰教清真寺,从而给后人留下了一批拜占廷式古建筑的样本,所谓文明的进步仅止于此、、、、、、
   
    与罗马帝国有关的最后一块土地就这样消失在历史中了。拜占廷人以一场悲壮的绝地死战,多少为罗马城的可耻溃灭挽回了一点颜面和尊严。起码不会有后人讥笑他们“更无一个是男儿”了。
   
    当然,如果从人道反战的立场上来看,西罗马帝国的灭亡似乎更容易让人感到轻松一点;但是从悲剧审美和人的尊严的角度来看,迦太基和君士坦丁堡的陷落肯定更有诗意,更让人难忘、、、、、、
   
     (四)
   
    在世界历史上,先后出现的以极权专制为共同点的帝国有一大串,但是它们无一例外地都先后灭亡了,那么,帝国终究要灭亡的根本原因究竟是什么呢?
   
    我们从小就熟悉的理论说,阶级斗争是历史的根本动力,也是时代变化、制度兴亡的主要原因。但是,用罗马帝国的兴亡来证明这一理论就会很牵强无力。中外历史学家在古罗马历史中发现的可称为阶级战争的仅有斯巴达克起义一个孤例,而且那是发生在共和时代后期。待进入罗马史的巅峰时期——帝制时代以后,大规模的阶级战争就再也没有发生过。特别是在罗马帝国灭亡前,统治力量萎缩,内外矛盾加剧,社会空前混乱的时期(按某种理论这应该是发生阶级战争的最佳条件),斯巴达克起义式的典型的阶级斗争并没有发生。如果硬说这是罗马帝国灭亡的原因,那还不如说是维苏威火山的爆发导致了帝国灭亡。
   
    如果说迦太基帝国的灭亡主要是因为遇到了不可抗外力的话,罗马帝国的灭亡显然不是同一类型。按照“内因是根据,外因是条件”的原理,罗马帝国最大的危险其实并不在于有个“亡我之心不死”的强大外敌,甚至也没有阶级斗争理论所津津乐道,其镜像产物维稳思维所严密防范的斯巴达克式奴隶造反的危险,而是深藏在帝国“萧墙之内”的恶性肿瘤——不受任何监督的“塌方式腐败”和没有任何规则的权力恶斗,这才是帝国灭亡的终极原因。而这个恶性肿瘤是一切帝国体制与生俱来的死亡基因,其爆发之日,就是死亡来临之时。
   
    该死的必将死去,并且终于死去了,事情就是这样简单。大树倾覆之时,无须怨天尤人,只须看看自己虫蚀已空的树干,和糜烂到底的树根。